Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Capitol Hill Classic 10K

Great race, rather ridiculous weekend. When I signed up for this race, it was because Jon was coming down for some show at the 9:30 Club. Some gay stuff he thought he heard on Sirius, but it turned out to be really fruity stuff that he hadn' t even heard before. I think he might have enjoyed himself if he had gone seeing as how the place probably would have been packed to the rafters with teenage girls, but I guess he was more interested in seeing if the folks in DC can measure out a race course properly. Anyways, he would be in town, so why not do another race together? He says he challenged me, but I think it was more of a mutual thing, like "You want to race when you come down? Sure...". But, if challenging me sounds good, I'm happy to keep that story. I screwed up, though, and forgot that my mother was going to be in town that weekend too. So, instead of having her stay with us and play with Noah, I had instead offered up the guest bedroom to Jon and figured I'd spend my time with him. This is all fine, of course, because my mother drives me nuts and I'd rather not spend more time listening to her prattle on about her weight loss than I absolutely have to. I prattle on about running a bit, but I don't think I'm as irritating and besides...I like listening to myself talk about running. But, this irritated my sister, since it meant that she would have to do all the driving around. Alyssa was already in Florida and was flying back home with our mother in tow, but she didn't want to get stuck with her all weekend either. I figure it is only fair that Alyssa has to do this once in awhile considering all the shit my parents do for her. What an ungrateful turd she can be!

I got a bit nutty trying to plan things out and appease everyone, to the point where I clearly made Audrey nuts. As a solution, I finally just accepted that it could be weird and messy and that somebody might not be too happy. But, screw it. What can you do? I couldn't tell Jon not to come down and I couldn't tell my mother she couldn't come over. As the weekend got close, it turned out that our friends, Karsten and Laura, and their daughter, Sofia, would be in town too. But, at least they didn't need a place to stay.

The weekend didn't go all that badly, actually. I got to spend a fair amount of time with Jon, which I know he really enjoyed. I kept catching him looking at me, smiling. I think it makes him feel special to hang out with me. My mother and sister were fine most of the day on Saturday, but they got strange at the end. We had a BBQ and invited a few more people over to help justify all the food we planned to cook. I can't understand why Sheila had to stuff our fridge with Mike's Hard Lemonade, since she is the only lightweight that drinks that kind of crap. That stuff is for sorority girls and has no business in my fridge. Shit, man, it took up all the room we had intended for the Amstel Light! By the way, don't buy beer at Giant. Jon and I went to get a six pack before the BBQ and those slippery bastards tried to rip us off. Jon wanted the new Heineken Light stuff, but the six pack came up at the register as $15.99! That is the same price they are charging for a 12 pack. When we pointed this out, the bitchy woman who seemed to be some sort of manager couldn't bother to do anything other than tell us that the price is whatever came up on the register, basically. We tried to show here the obvious mistake at the shelf, but she didn't care and just gave us her backside and walked away. Nice. We bought the Amstel instead and won't be buying any more beer from them.

After the beer and BBQ and cake, everybody quickly left and/or fell asleep. Jon was going to stay over, but it seemed like Sheila strong armed him into coming to her house. Maybe she wanted to get him to try some wedding cake or to help her pick out some invitations or something. He is good at all that sensitive stuff. And Sheila needs all the help she can get. Do I sound like a total dick yet?

My mother and sister couldn't decide whether to stay at our place Saturday night or go back to Alyssa's place. They ended up going back to the city. I can't really tell why and I can't say that it matters all that much. It meant we had the house to ourselves, which was kind of nice. The next morning, I picked up Jon and we headed into the city for the race. I got a little turned around on the way there, but we had plenty of time to sign in, get our packets, travel back and forth to the car, hit the bathroom, and meet up with Bridget. We tried to get into the pack in the few moments before the gun went off, but we couldn't really figure out where to enter and what exactly was going on. The signs to indicate overall finish time, providing some indication of what kind of group you belonged in, were hard to see. So, we just jumped in and took off when it was time. I didn't have to do much dodging or weaving, so I guess we picked the right spot.

The race was enoyable, but uneventful. Running around RFK was rather boring, but the section that went through the neighborhood was nice. A fair number of people were outside, a bunch of kids were waving and cheering, and a few people had hoses going to help runners cool off. I was feeling pretty good until the last 1.5 miles or so. We headed down the hill and turned around the US Capitol and then it hit me...we'd be finishing the race by running back up the hill. That was not easy...uphill, into the sun, heading into the home stretch. I did have some energy left at the end, though, and "kicked it out" in the last few hundred feet. I felt great afterwards and wandered around for a while trying to find Jon, Bridget, or Audrey and Noah. I found my family first and then Bridget and Jon joined us in the playground.

For some reason, I often have to take a big crap after a race. I guess the excitement gets peristalsis going or something and my intestines gotta get to work. So, despite the warnings from Jon and Bridget about the tiny toilets, I went to do my business in the elementary school that race was staged at. Yeah, tiny is an understatement. These toilets were made for a doll house. I laughed out loud when I went in the stall. I sat down, though, and did what I had to do. Of course, this required holding my junk to the side with my left hand to keep it out of the water. It also required that I stand up to make room for my pile as it mounted up...you wouldn't want to just sit on your own doo if you can help it. And, I had to stand up, hold my can open and wipe with the free hand. There just was no way to wipe normally. Not the most inconvenient poop I've ever had, but it certainly ranks in the top five.

After the race, we went up to Adams Morgan, grabbed some bagels at So's Your Mom, and hung out in the park for a while. My mother and sister met up with us, keeping my mother from bitching about not seeing Noah again, and keeping us from having to buy those two moochers breakfast.

Here are some shots from the race...I did a screen capture of the stuff from Brightroom. There is no way in hell I am going to pay them for these photos.



I had wanted to run a sub 8:00/mi pace and I went way past my expectations. I've ramped up my "training" as a result and I think this bodes well for my goal of a marathon in less than 4 hours. In the end, the weekend worked out well and I surpassed the goal I had set for the race. I can't complain...too much.

Capitol Hill Classic - 10K
Washington, DC
May 21, 2006

Gun Time: 49:36
Net Time: 48:19
Pace: 7:47
Age Place: 83/233
Overall Result: 377/1152

3 comments:

Jon said...

Dude. I like the new color. Much better than doo doo brown. While your story is entertaining, I must correct a few points:

* I never challenged you to a race. That would just be insane.

* Sheila never strong armed me. She was very nice to allow me to stay over cuz you said I'd be better off clearing out of your house before it got too goofy. I feel bad for spending no time with Sheila and Brice.

* I don't think the $15.99 for the 6 pack was a mistake. That's just Virginia math. 6 x $1.33 = $15.99 in Virginia.

Nice job on the race, dude.

Dave Walsh said...

you have some hot beefy manly man legs now Dave. They better amend the constitution quickly or else im coming for your man Audrey...

Audrey said...

Is Liam still nursing, Walsh? If so, maybe we can just switch. I loves me some big lactating boobies. Seeing as the Senate voted down the "marriage amendment" you are still in the clear.